The Scion of the South’s Emergency College Football Contingency Plan
September 3, 2008 |
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By Jack Cutts
A quick glance at my watch told me the time was now 5:37pm. My pulse quickened. As the strains of the Wedding March echoed from the rafters above, I could sense that we weren’t going to make it. With kickoff scheduled for 6:00pm, it was immediately clear that we were operating under Code Red conditions. As I fumbled for my mobile phone, I could sense a proverbial crossing of the Rubicon. If this didn’t work, unspeakable darkness awaited me…
Had the above been an actual emergency, how would you respond? Ask any Southerner what they’re doing on a Saturday afternoon between the end of August and the first week of January and they’ll probably rattle off an agenda that revolves around watching college football. While some are able to maintain some perspective about life and its priorities, I suffer from no such affliction. Nevertheless, there are times when life (and wife!) intervenes and you cannot be at the game or in front of a TV. It is in these times that any good College Football Fan must be prepared to enact the following “Emergency College Football Contingency Plan.” Fortunately, there is a wealth of consumer electronics devices out there to help you wriggle out of the tightest situations and shirk the most demanding of obligations.
|
Alert Code |
Scenario |
CE Devices Required |
|
Code Blue |
Smell that pork barbeque? You are actually attending the game in person. Congratulations! |
CE devices are optional at this alert level. AM Radio might be preferred for play-by-play. Advanced fans will incorporate CE devices during tailgating, but this is not compulsory. |
|
Code Green |
You are watching at home on an HDTV. |
DVR is a must here. The ability to pause and rewind is crucial for second guessing referees’ calls and pausing to refresh beverages. The ESPN Gameplan package is highly recommended and may be required in certain situations. |
|
Code Yellow |
You are away from a TV but have managed to maintain some form of access to the Internet. |
Slingbox is a perfect go-to device here. Anything you could be watching at home will stream to your mobile phone or laptop. Similar solutions include Orb, HAVA, BeyondTV and SageTV. |
|
Code Orange |
You have intermittent or zero access to the Internet and no television. The horror! |
Sirius XM Radio carries every game for each of the six BCS Conferences. Reception is virtually ubiquitous in the continental US. |
|
Code Red |
Leaving your current situation will result in irreparable damage to your reputation. You may or may not have reliable Internet access. |
Your only option here is some sort of application like MSN Remote Record or TiVO Internet scheduling. If you believe there is some chance you will be caught in this situation, it is advisable to schedule the recording before leaving home. |
|
Code Black |
You are locked in a cave of sports deprivation. You have a phone (landline or cell) but absolutely no access to the Internet or a TV. |
Call a friend that you know is at home. Ask them to turn the game on a spare TV and place the phone in front of the TV speaker so you can listen. This will consume at least three hours of voice minutes on your mobile plan. Maintaining battery life in this scenario is paramount. |
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December 24th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Excellent, thanks!
March 9th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Hi, For the life of me, I can’t find your rss feed. Can you Help me, please. I would like to add your blog to my daily reader.
March 10th, 2009 at 9:29 am
Hi Gary,
our RSS feed is at the very top of the right-hand column of the blog page. Thanks for following.